Here we go again

I doubt many of us were surprised by the announcements yesterday. As we've watched the news and seen the infection rate going up, and so sadly the death rate with it - we've probably all been expecting another lockdown for a little while. 

And yet... perhaps just for me, it has the danger of feeling a bit exhausting, overwhelming and painful. I dislike the phrase "the new normal" but if there is something which is consistent in this season, it's that very little seems to be consistent. 

One of the biggest surprises this week is, if I'm honest, that Jess and I moved into the house without anyone getting ill, or the house being unavailable, or the movers ending up in Southampton or Southport - or some other such unexpected change. Everything went normally and according to plan - and as I sit here reflecting on the week, it's sad how unusual that is in this season of life.

For those of us following Bible in one year, the NT reading is from Hebrews today.

For every house is built by someone, but God is the builder of everything. This passage is speaking of God's faithfulness. In a season of inconsistency, of change, of insecurity - there is one we can look to who is constant, never changing, and at the foundation of all.

I preached my final sermon at St Paul's a few weeks ago on trust (you can listen here) and as part of that I shared a picture I was given by a friend who had been praying for me in this season. The picture was of me crossing a river on stepping stones, at night, in a deep fog. It was possible, most of the time, to see the stone just ahead, but not the ones beyond. This picture spoke so clearly to me, and I expect it may to others as well. 

The reality is, this season, if it's teaching us anything, it's that we need to be careful who or indeed what we are putting our hope in, what are we trusting. If we feel our foundations are being rocked - God is calling us, once again to lift our eyes to Him, to hear His voice and to know His leading and His faithfulness. 

Perhaps we need, once again, to draw near to the one who speaks - through His word. Words of life, words of hope, words of light - word's which give us promise that His yoke is easy and His burden is light. Hebrews reminds us, not to harden our hearts to Him - but to hear Him, and to know His calling, and ultimately to trust Him.

Throughout this last few weeks, I've not been able to get the below song out of my head. It's a bit old now, but it's words ring true today. There IS a light shining that the darkness doesn't understand.

Let's, today be people of light, people of hope, people who place our hope and trust in God - and "Know therefore that the Lord your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, to a thousand generations" (Deut. 7:9) Amen

There's a battle raging over this land

A deep damage in the people

But pride stops us

Stretching out our withered hand

But God has stretched out to heal us

This I know this I know

This I know this I know

 

That just one touch from the King

Changes ev'rything

Just one touch from the King

Changes ev'rything (ev'rything)

 

There's a great darkness over this land

A deep darkness on the people

But a light is shining

That the dark can't understand

The Light of the world King Jesus

Do you know do you know

Do you know do you know

 

Oh land oh land oh land

Hear the Word of the Lord

Oh land oh land oh land

Hear the Word of the Lord

What are you expecting?

I've been on the verge of writing this blog for about 6 months - but the time has never quite felt right. As we announced my new role a week or so ago, I now feel peace about sharing a few things with you about the calling I've sensed into the role, and what it's taught me about Prophesy.

 

Back in December I preached (fairly badly in my opinion) on Isaiah 10, and I talked about prophesy often having multiple purposes. The prophesies of Isaiah were about a number of seasons and times, the time he found himself in (his present day), the time of Jesus, our present day (some 2000 years later) and a time which is yet to come (which we can read about in Revelation). As we read them, a bit like a focus of a camera lens, we can see the same picture but in different ways. 

 

There are a number of purposes to this prophesy, firstly to declare God’s displeasure and judgement on what He sees around Him and to turn God’s people away from their sin and disobedience. But I believe one of the primary purposes of this (and any) prophesy, is to speak of a future hope and promise (see 1 Cor 14:3).

 

I've been talking a little bit recently about a survey I did a number of years ago, where the question was asked of a church congregation "do you believe that God will move more powerfully in the future than He has in the past?". Overwhelming the congregation said no. Let the reader understand that this church (which I love) had been heavily influenced by John Wimber's ministry - and had seen massive moves of God amongst them 20 years earlier. Since then, they had seen much less of this visible power, and had allowed their ongoing experiences to dictate their expectations. 

 

And so often this is the case -  we allow our experiences to dictate what we are expecting - rather than what we know of God through His word.

 

Maybe there is a little wisdom in this; 'it stops you getting hurt' you might say, but are we, as a consequence, missing out on allowing God to move powerfully amongst us?

 

How many times have you prayed for someone to be healed, for example? Wimber himself, famously prayed for over 100 people to be healed before he saw the first person healed. How did he feel after attempt number 98? Imagine if he had given up after attempt number 99?

 

The purpose of today's blog is not to think too deeply about why we sometimes see God work powerfully, and sometimes don't (I've blogged about that previously). It's to ask myself and perhaps you the question - what are you expecting? And, crucially, what is setting that expectation?

 

I sensed the call to St Jude's back in June last year - I have a text message sent to my prayer triplet on the day to prove it! So many times over the last 14 months (since then) the Lord has reminded me of that call in some quite extraordinary ways. And yet, lots of people told me it probably wasn't going to happen. I was strongly encouraged to apply for other roles and was advised not to pin all, if any, of my hopes on this one position.

 

So good were my wise counsel of friends in this issuing of advice, that I began to believe it - as we went on holiday in early June I even began to wonder if it was worth me going to the interviews at all - so convinced was I becoming of the 'world's' expectations.

 

The Lord, in His graciousness, reminded me of my own talk from last Christmas, and asked me the questions, I had asked others at the time - what are you expecting? Are you allowing prophesy to speak truth over experience in your life?

 

I spent time in Romans 4 that day which (abridged) says this:

 

"Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed... Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised."

 

Corrected by the graciousness of God, I returned to believing that the Lord was indeed calling me into this role, and went to the interviews (obviously!) He continued to be gracious and faithful - right up-to and including the day of the interviews themselves, with more remarkable signs that this was what he was calling me to. 

 

My calling to St Paul’s was very similar and equally remarkable. One thing which I believe to be true (perhaps obviously) is that doing as God calls is without question the best thing we can do – not always the easiest thing, but most certainly the best. Knowing this gives me a real sense of excitement for St Jude’s as I prepare to join them as vicar – nervous excitement – but excitement none-the-less.  On the day of the interviews a praying friend encouraged me with 1 Thes 5:24 “The one who calls you is faithful, and He will do it.” – If God calls, our response should be obedience and a commitment to believing His voice, knowing that He is faithful and He will do it.

 

Isaiah proclaimed God's hope and future promise to an unbelieving generation. He tried to turn people's eyes away from the world, and its expectations - and to what God was saying. So, dear reader (if you're still there) - I ask you the same questions today.

 

What are you expecting?

What is directing those expectations? Is it your experiences or is it God's word?

Are you expecting to see God to move more powerfully in the future than He has in the past?

 

Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed. 

 

I want to commit not only to listening to God (something I've done for a long time now) but to believing what He says - and so setting my expectations not on my experiences, but on His word.

 

(Below - a prophetic painting, by Jess - and our first attempt at the real thing)

Waiting for my real life to begin

When I started this blog (nearly 3 years ago) I talked about 'serving with broken hands' - you can read it here:

Broken Hands - an introduction

I talked about how in a number of seasons in my life I had managed to damage my left hand - specifically before I was married and before I was ordained. At the time I reflected that perhaps God was teaching me through the realities of my human failings that I really cannot 'do' being ordained, just like I can not 'do' marriage, in my own strength - but only through the grace and power of God. 

Well folks, my hand is broken again - a few days ago our toddler had an accident in the middle of the night, which - without giving too much detail meant at 3am I needed to wash my feet. In an attempt to not wake my wife (the only thing which was successful that evening) I managed to break our bathroom sink, and in attempting (and failing) to fix it, now have a rather deep and painful cut, once again on my left hand.

Perhaps the real lesson I need to learn is that I'm no where near as practically minded as I think I am. (Thanks to Ed who fixed the sink for us - at a social distance, obviously).

I posted on Sunday (just a few days ago) about how, at the moment, I'm not really worrying too much about our future and know that God has it in hand. All that is true and I'm not about to issue a retraction - I still know the peace which comes from knowing that I can trust God - but I've been reflecting further for these few days since.

These times are strange - if one more person on the news tells me they are unprecedented I may have to throw something at the television - which, in itself, would be unprecedented I guess...

For some these are really hard times, for our wonderful NHS, for those ensuring we can eat, have water and electricity, have safe streets and our rubbish collected (to name but a few) - they are not only busier than ever, but also literally involve them putting their lives at risk each and each day. It is right that we thank them by clapping each week, and we must find ways of thanking them with more than just applause when we can.

But for the rest of us, or at least for me, it can feel like the world has come to a stop - that we aren't really going anywhere, or doing anything. As an example, my university have decided that I don't need to to submit an essay for my current module - I will simply have been deemed to have passed it without assessment - like, somehow these next three months don't really 'count'. 

I doubt many of you know the song 'Waiting for my real life to begin' by Colin Hay (his band, Men at Work, wrote 'I come from a land down under', don't let that put you off). You can listen to it here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQBHPn9sDfY  It's not a worship song and I don't think Colin Hay is a Christian.

His second verse says:

When I awoke today, suddenly nothing happened

But in my dreams, I slew the dragon

And down this beaten path, up this cobbled lane

I'm walking in my old footsteps, once again

I don't want to give you the impression I'm not doing anything, that without a church to be curating (that's a word) in I'm sat at home waiting for the phone to ring. Quite the opposite, I had expected this term to be a quiet one as we prepared to move - it is, in fact, busier than ever. But yet, even amongst the 'stuff', I resonate with those words 'suddenly, nothing happened' - and certainly 'I'm walking in my old footsteps, once again'.

In a very real sense at the moment we are waiting - waiting for this whole thing to be over, waiting for normality, or some semblance of it to return, waiting to see loved ones or even just to nip to Tesco at 10pm for chocolate because you have none in the house and you really want it (a regular pre-lockdown occurrence in our house). 

As I've been thinking about my poor, broken hand some more  today, I think God wants to speak to me through it again.

Each time it's been broken in the past, I've been on the edge of something, something big, something that's needed a lot of work or attention - something that it would be easy to get lost in and rely only on my own strength.

This is, perhaps, the opposite experience. There is no big thing for me to do (I'm not a medic and would be rubbish at producing a vaccine) there is no project, no exciting adventure around the corner for me to be distracted by. Right now, I have to wait:

As I write, I'm reminded of Psalm 40, some selected verses (you can read the rest here)

I waited patiently for the Lord;
he turned to me and heard my cry.

Blessed is the one

who trusts in the Lord,

Many, Lord my God

are the wonders you have done,

the things you planned for us.

None can compare with you;

were I to speak and tell of your deeds,

they would be too many to declare.

I think the Lord wants me to remember today that it's not just in the busyness, or the exciting adventures that it's easy to lose sight of him - but also in the waiting.

I quoted the ordination service in my first blog when the bishop says "You cannot bear the weight of this calling in your own strength, but only by the grace and power of God."

I have never believed those words are just true of those of us with a dog collar - it's perhaps even more true, that we all need the grace and power of God in this time of waiting.

Paul Gooder has written an excellent book called 'The Meaning in the Waiting' - you can find it on Amazon here.

She talks about waiting in life being like a pregnancy and the desire that a pregnant couple have for the baby to be born, and to be through with the boring waiting bit. But, if we think about it, in reality, no one who is pregnant wants the waiting to end too soon and for the baby to come early. 

Sometimes this period of waiting can seem passive to the outsider, but internally it’s extremely active. In those 9 months, HUGE amounts are going on, both physically as the child grows, but emotionally in the mother and father as they prepare for their child’s timely arrival.

If we allow ourselves to think about these seasons of waiting in these terms, then it may become less about passing the time between the moments, and more about the deep and lasting value of the time itself. 

David says in this Psalm that he waits patiently for the Lord, he trusts the Lord, and he reflects on the many wonders He has done. 

And so, Colin Hay - much as I love you and your music - it's time for me to learn the lesson of my broken hand and perhaps more importantly of David - and once again to find value in this time - to wait patiently for the Lord, and to reflect again on His many wonders.

Faith seeking understanding

In mid January I preached on my favourite passage of scripture, Ephesians 1:15-24 - Paul's prayer to the Ephesian church. If you were there I wonder if you can remember what I said? Don't worry, it's not a test, January was, I think, 350 years ago!

As part of my talk, I mentioned the fact that Jess and I expect to move on from St Paul's at some point over the next 12  months. Curacies are meant to be just over 3 years in Coventry diocese, and I'll have been here 3 years in July. I talked about needing to trust God in the uncertainty of what was to come.... how little I knew!

I've lost count of the number of times I've been asked recently 'how's this whole global pandemic affecting the job search?' (or words to that effect). In case you're also wondering the quick answer is that largely things are on hold until it's possible to visit and be interviewed by a church in person, and so there isn't much to report - but saying this usually brings the response of 'oh wow, that must be really hard for you? You must be feeling really uncertain?'.



As people have said this I've found myself wondering - is it hard? It feels like it should be hard, it feels like I should be waking up each day and begin with a period of screaming at the top of my voice. Or perhaps, whenever anyone asks, simply replying with a high pitched "I'M FINE" (ref Ross on the TV show Friends). 

But I'm not doing these things - not about this anyway - the reality is, I actually am fine, and it set me wondering why? 


It could be of course, that like so many people, I'm so distracted by everything else going on at the moment I don't have time to panic about any future possible job. Perhaps all my 'panic and unsettled emotions' are focussed on world events, not what's next for the Tams family. I'm not sure it's just that.

When I spoke in January I told the story of being at a swimming pool with Jacob and his grandparents. He decided that he wanted to try getting in on his own, and so, wearing as many floatation devices as it was possible for me to strap onto him, he tentatively lowered himself into the pool. Fine - no dramas. He wanted to do it again, this time (because an Aunt or his Grandpa had I think) he wanted to jump in - OK - I was now significantly more nervous.

Jacob not only jumped in, but dive bombed into the pool, fully going under, probably touching the bottom - possibly, in my imagination at least, visiting the ancient city of Atlantis - before bobbing up to the top. My heart was in my mouth expecting the full on toddler meltdown which was certain to ensue. As he came to the surface, he laughed, ran out of the pool and did it again, and again, and again. He trusted the floats (far more than I did) and was fearless in the face of, what others (certainly I) might see as dangerous uncertainty. 

I've been drawn to this story and this Ephesians passage again as I've reflected on this over the last few days. 

I've know levels of uncertainty before, I'm sure we all have. OK, fair enough, I've never lived through a lockdown, a pandemic or anything like this, most people haven't - but I've known fear of what might or might not happen next. I've know uncertainty over a possible future house or job, or even spouse - these are all things I'm sure we've been through, or perhaps are going through alongside this current situation. Through them all, one thing has been constant - God has been faithful. In some things I'm still working out what His faithfulness looks or looked like, but I know it's true.

What's my point? Well Joyce Meyer puts it like this: "we don't need to have more self confidence, we need to have more God confidence" 

I am at peace about our future job, because I know God has got it in hand. I know that He will be faithful, because I know He has always been faithful. Maybe, just maybe, I need to transfer some of this trust, some of this faith into the current world events.

If we find our hope in our future, if we find security in our circumstance, or if we find our peace in something else, we'll find, time and time again, that these things don't stand up to testing.

What can we do then?

I'm currently re-reading through the Bible in One Year, and we've not long since finished reading Numbers. Here we read of the exile and the many years that God's faithful people spent in the wilderness. I was struck afresh by Moses' response to the uncertainty and times of trial they faced. Time and time again, the scriptures repeat "Moses did as the Lord commanded him". Moses had faith and trusted in God, he took each day as it came - and simply followed as the Lord commanded. 

Today I want some more of that, for every area of my life - trust and obedience to what God commands us to do for today. Or to put it another way, with Jesus' own words:

 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?" (Matthew 6:25-27)

As I've written this, the song Cornerstone has been going through my head - you can find a link to it here, but here are some glorious lyrics in this old hymn, made new.

My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus' blood and righteousness

Then later...

Through the Storm, He is Lord, Lord of all

Amen

P.S. (In case it needs saying) Just a quick health warning - please don't worry, this isn't a crazy evangelical saying "ignore the restrictions, do what you like, the Lord will protect". Do what the government says, be safe, of course - but ultimately, I believe what Paul is calling us to - what the whole of scripture calls us to - is to find our hope, security and ultimately our peace in God. Or to put it another way - 

How's your hope?

I’ve not written one of these for a while (sorry) if we end up being in ‘lock down’ you might get a few more – but I’ve had this on my heart for a few days and I wanted to share.

Covid19, is, without question unprecedented in our age and I’m sure you have, like me, been keeping as up to date as possible with developments. Early last week I listened to a podcast from Kris Vallaton of Bethel church America (found here) who spoke about a second virus at work in our world, the virus of fear.

As I’ve reflected on this, I don’t think he’s wrong, but I also don’t think this second ‘virus’ came with the rise of covid19. For the last few years our nation has, for a lot of people, been battling a fear of ‘Brexit’ what it looks like, what it will mean, how it will affect us. Perhaps in this nation, at least, we’ve simply substituted one fear for another.

Never wanting to jump on a particular President’s band wagon, but I doubt the media outlets are helping, every time I go to check the news I half expect a big counter at the top of the page telling me how many people are now infected and how many have died. 

But how are we to respond to this?

Of course, Covid19 is serious, it is likely to continue in its rise and we will, as our prime minister said, likely see many more people die as a result. We must do everything we can in order to protect both ourselves, and crucially the most vulnerable in our society.

If you’ve ever heard me preach you will know that my favourite passage of scripture is from Ephesians 1.

I pray that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in his holy people, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every name that is invoked, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.

There is so much richness in these verses but I want to pick up on two words, firstly, Hope. 

How hopeful are you feeling today? 

It’s been said that the words “do not fear” appear in the bible 365 times, sadly I can’t find them all – but it’s certainly true this command of God appears in scripture a lot (I found 145).

Paul prays for the Ephesian church that their eyes would be opened to the ‘hope to which he has called you’ – and whenever I get to this part of the passage I think of the story of Elisha and his servant, seemingly about to be captured and Elisha’s servant suddenly feels completely hopeless. Elisha prays “open his eyes” and suddenly the servant is able to see all of the resources of heaven on the hill tops around him. (If you don’t know the story, read it here) 

I led worship yesterday evening, and as part of it wanted to include the song ‘raise a hallelujah’ (found here)

The chorus says:

I'm gonna sing, in the middle of the storm

Louder and louder, you're gonna hear my praises roar

Up from the ashes, hope will arise

Death is defeated, the King is alive!

Whatever happens over the next few days, weeks and months – we have a hope which is greater, and can look to a God who is greater than anything this world can throw at us.

And so, my first response is to sing (metaphorically as well as, probably, actually) in the middle of this storm, to the God who brings hope. And I’m going to pray that He will open my eyes to see His resources and to not be afraid.

The second word I want to pick up on quickly is the word power, and I wonder how powerful you are feeling at the moment? Unless you’re one of the people working on a vaccine, then perhaps you’re feeling pretty powerless in the face of this outbreak. Perhaps these feelings of powerlessness are to blame for the panic buying we are seeing – as people feel powerless it’s only natural to cling on to the things which are within our control.

Paul prays that our eyes would be open to see, the great power available to us and the reality is that we do have power. God has given us power to see change and His Kingdom come through our prayers – and the archbishops have rightly called us to pray, this must be our first response and something powerful we can all do. 

I’m sure, however, there are other things we could do – perhaps contacting on the phone those we know who are alone. I know members of our church family are already reaching out and giving notes to their neighbours offering to help if they end up having to self isolate – this is a great idea, maybe even attach some chocolate! Whatever we decide, I’m sure there are ways we can not only help and support one another, but also be powerful people to spread some joy, laughter and hope.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful, wouldn't it be powerful - if the hope which arises from the ashes of this coronavirus is the healing of the separations and divisions which we’ve seen grow so much over the last few years. 

Whatever you do, I encourage you to know that you are not powerless, but God calls us know His power at work in us, and to point others to a God who is able to ‘immeasurably more than we could ever ask or imagine’.

I want to finish with quoting a blessing that God placed (independently) on both mine and my colleague’s hearts for the end of yesterday’s services at St Paul’s. Perhaps, if you’re willing, you might pray it with me today:

Go forth into the world in peace.

Be of good courage.

Hold fast that which is good.

Render to no one evil for evil.

Strengthen the fainthearted.

Support the weak.

Help the afflicted.

Show love to everyone.

Love and serve the Lord,

rejoicing in the power of the Holy Spirit;

and the blessing of God almighty,

the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit,

be among us and remain with us always. Amen.